project 366

Day 29: Clarity.

Generally speaking, I am the worst meditator in the world. My mind is always buzzing with something. Years of multitasking means a lack of focus.

So, when I’m in yoga class and the instructor goes, “Still your mind and focus on your breath,” I do anything but. I also don’t have deep, calming thoughts. I mostly think of how sore I will be the next morning.

Yesterday, I was doing something that involved my forehead being on the ground while the rest of my body was ready to spring into action, causing the blood to rush to my head. I thought, “God, this is uncomfortable. It hurts. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

And then something else in my head went, “Things that are good for you aren’t always easy.”

And after that, I accepted what I was doing and may have meditated for the first time ever at the end of class.

I just felt better. It was a moment of clarity, after a week that included starting a new job, making my body adjust to a different schedule, attempting to learn the entirety of Mozart’s Requiem and getting myself to go out and meet new people (believe it or not, that last one is sometimes a challenge even for one as extroverted as me).

When I described the moment to Becky, she replied, “Your head is now a motivational poster.”

Which, of course, led to me thinking about the motivational posters on How I Met Your Mother.

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Whatever works.

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